Not So Simple Questions

A few days ago I was asked a question that I did not know how to answer.  It was concerning love.  The questioner said it should be an easy answer - yes or no.  And really, he was right.  Love is always the answer.  But as usual, I'm getting ahead of myself.

I know that sooner or later I will have to explain who I am.  Those are simple facts so it might as well be sooner than later.  My name is Amanda. I am 29.  Do you know the problem with turning 29? On your 29th birthday, no one just says, "Happy Birthday!"  Instead they get a wicked grin and say, "Ooooo!! You are going to be 30 next year!" This is what I call a "duh concept" -- so simple you can only say, "well, duh!"  I know that historically (and comically), women do not want to age and at some point, we are no longer proud to proclaim our age.  Getting old is equivocal with being useless, less desirable, past the prime of life.  My problem with turning 30 is not that I will be any of these things.  My problem with turning 30 is that I finally feel young and invigorated, and I have to say I'm 30, when I finally feel the delight of youth.  Eventually I will explain this in more detail, but once again, I digress. Just suffice it to say, the banner at my birthday this year  better read "Happy Second 29th Birthday!"

So I am 29.  I am a social studies teacher at a high school in the Houston area.  I grew up in Huntsville, TX, the Prison Capital of Texas.  Although I have not lived in Huntsville in 7 years, I still do a double take when someone is walking down the street wearing all white.  Escapee!!  Ah, no... Just some brave soul who shows no fear towards mustard or ketchup.

I currently teach 9th grade.  Freshman are a very unique breed of child.  I teach in an inner city school where girls come to school dressed for the club and the boys wear their pants around their knees. Disrespect is rampant for self and others.  But I love my job.  I connect well with inner city kids. Which is really funny because I was raised in a very country town and stick out like a sore thumb in the hallways of my school. But nonetheless, I like my job and love working with teenagers.  I want to strangle them sometimes, but I love them.  They discovered my love of Star Wars and know it is time to calm down when I start force choking individual students. 

It seemed like "the basics" would go much more quickly but perhaps it is good this way.  I think I'll stop there for now.  This blog is about renewing hope in life, my desires, and myself so I think it is good to take things slow. It seems it should be simple to explain who you are, but how can someone be summarized in a simple blog entry.  Life is so beautifully complex, which is merely a reflection of the complexity in which we have been created. I've been alive for 29 years and only now do I feel that it is ok to be who I am. I really am enough.  I hope...

In faith and love,

Amanda